Prayer Diary

Thoughts and prayers: a writing project

11/17/2021

You can read about my new writing project on today’s acottagebythesea.net
Working title: Keep Me in Your Thoughts and Prayers; a phrase you are familiar with.
As a prayer person, I’ve often thought disparagingly when hear that phrase. It felt like a throw away. Currently, however, I am praying to get rid of my judgments and understand that ‘thoughts and prayers’ is inclusive. I don’t want to be a religious snob.

Praying out of love

11/15/2021

My sermon lifting up the saints at my church who passed away during the pandemic was received with open hearts. For me, the project from start to finished, has helped release some of the angst that has been too prevalent in my life. I’m talking about the anger and fear that I have allowed our country’s political situation.
I am praying that God will help me release the hold (worry/anger) that grips me. I hear God telling me to pray out of love: to keep my heart open to the good, to pray for those are not loving, and to concentrate on the commitments that I am called to keep: for my husband and I to stay in our home; to help and pray for those I know who are in need; and to pray for DCETG (democracy, the covid situation, the environment, teachers, and gun control). I am sure God hears these prayer more clearly when I am not upset.

Honoring the saints in our lives

11/6/2021

(Also posted on cottagebythesea)

You may have noticed a larger than usual time gap between my last post and this one. I haven’t taken a hiatus from writing. In fact I’ve been busy writing vignettes of the seven church members who died since the beginning of the pandemic when we stopped having in-person memorials services. Tomorrow I will share these at our All Saints Sunday Service.
    I’ve loved putting together recollections from family members and friends, snippets from published obituaries, and memories of my own (for I was privileged to know each person). Each died during covid, but not from covid. Six were in their nineties, the oldest being 99, the youngest, 79; four were men, three women.
   One challenge was to keep each vignette to between 350 and 400 words. The other challenge was to select three words that succinctly described each of these saints.
Here is the array of words that came forth: dependable, organized, ‘a good man’, kind, gentle, full of integrity, optimistic, determined, grateful, unfazed, forward-thinking, positive, loyal, honest, a gentleman, sense of humor, optimistic, fun-loving, 100% dedicated, reliable, loyal.
   I trust some of these apply to people you know, and yes, even to you.

Loving God, self, neighbor

10/30/2021

St. Barbara

“Love God with all your mind, heart, and soul; and love your neighbor as yourself.” We hear a version of that throughout the Hebrew Bible and the New Testament, and we say, “Sure, that’s part of the Christian faith.” And then w are apt to move on, paying little attention to what that means, or, to be more specific, not living our lives loving God.
I’m good a compartmentalizing, addressing each aspect of my life differently. I can be compassionate toward someone who has just been diagnosed with cancer, and loving toward a neighbor who is facing a difficult decision. But then, I can be judgmental toward the politicians I don’t agree with; I can even wish evil upon them, forgetting they they too are my neighbor.
How can we become totally absorbed in loving God with all our mind, heart, and soul? By loving ourselves, because when we love ourselves, we can love our neighbors, each one of them. It’s not sequential, but if loving God is a good place to start.

Praying for the Red Sox

10/18/2021

I’m still praying for the two year old boy who was being beaten by his dad in front of the Church of San Lorenzo in Florence a couple of weeks ago. I’m also praying for the disturbed dad and the entire family, and for all families experiencing this kind of abuse. I am home, now; I have been for a week; the prayers continue.

Naturally, prayer is not practical, it is absurd; we have to realize that prayer is stupid from the ordinary common-sense point of view.

This comment by Oswald Chambers, that I posted today, challenges me as I pray. I can easily pray for this son and his dad; we can find general agreement that God does not want that kind of abuse. But what about other prayers in which right and wrong is not as clear? Some are wishes that seem selfish, and certainly ones that never get close to God.
For example, it is absurd to pray that the Red Sox win the World Series. In Roman 2:11 Paul tells us that God shows no partiality. Surely that must include a favorite baseball team.
But what about praying that a player do his best? But if I pray only for my team players, what about the other team? Is it different when individual players pray to do their best or thank God after a hitting a home run? I pray to do my best because I believe God wants that of me.

Please pray

10/5/2021

This morning I lit this candle for a two year old boy, his dad, and their family. Yesterday evening in the piazza of San Lorenzo (Florence) I witness this dad grab his son and pound him brutally in the head and then forcefully pick him up as little boy kicked and screamed. I was aghast. In all my years, this is the most violent brutality I have ever personally witnessed.
No one did a thing to help; I felt helpless. But, thanks be to God, there is prayer. Anyone reading this, please pray for this family. God will hear each of us praying in our own way from wherever we are in the world. Let us be grateful that we can help in this way, and for the internet in sending this prayer request.

Fiesole's Convent of St. Francis

10/2/2021

Yesterday I took Bus #7 to Fiesole and then walked the hill to the Convent of St. Francesco. The steep walk felt like a pilgrimage. This must have been my tenth visit to the monastery; oh, probably more. Again, my heart longs to be assigned one of those cells. Monks/nuns are called for life. I know that. But still, the longing remains and was renewed.

Walking around Florence with God

9/29/2021

I’m in Italy, ten nights in Florence, three in Rome. I tell people that I’m here walking around with God. And, that is true, although I also like walking around to find good restaurants, and of course I walk around museums, churches, and parks.
   I’m writing this in the Gardino delle Scuderie Reali, adjacent to the Boboli Gardens. A grandmother is enjoying two grandchildren; a group of students is having class; two people are walking hand in hand; a woman is sitting on a bench texting. Life is happening in Italy.
   What does this have to do with walking around with God? Well, it implies that God is with me, which means I am bringing God to these people who happen to be here this afternoon. Of course God is with them, but in case they don’t know it, I’m sending his presence to them through the Holy Spirit.
   If that sounds mysterious, well it is! Don’t try to figure it out. Instead, go somewhere nearby and send out love and peace to whoever is there. You will feel loving and peaceful, which a good thing for you, and it will become less mysterious. In believing that you are making a difference to them, you will grace. God’s grace is there for the asking. That’s the way it works.

Generosity, a fruit of the spirit

9/8/2021

Generosity, a fruit of the spirit. We sometimes consider being generous in terms of helping out with our time and talents, or giving money. Often these act of giving imply being generous in large amounts.
As Christians we know that our essence is to be generous, so that is where we begin—from the heart. On our best day, we begin by praying for people. From there we offer one of our most generous gifts, the gift of compassion, of listening, of accompanying someone when they need a steady friend. And yes, very likely we will be generous by doing little things and big things, and perhaps giving money.
But this isn’t just about us being generous. When we realize that we also need this generosity, when we become aware that we may be on someone else’s list as someone in need of prayer and compassion, then generosity becomes an act of giving and receiving— from a humble heart.

Pray for your enemies

9/2/2021

How can I pray for my enemies when I am so angry at them? I can’t, not when I feed my anger—specifically by listening to the news, not just listening but wallowing in it.
I’ve written about this before and unfortunately I will probably have to do so again. These obsessions/addictions don’t go away easily. I’d like to believe that I can deal with them once and for all, and that’s it. Done! But no, it doesn’t work that way. So I write again, sharing in public, admitting my vulnerability. That’s what I need to do because, yes, I do want to pray for my enemies.
This blog has become a form of confession--tell God and one other person. You, the reader, is that collective person. You help me shed what gets in the way. Not all at once, but small piece at a time. So once again, I am turning off the news, acting on my belief that yes, praying for my enemies does make a difference not only to me, not only to them, but at least in this case, to the world.