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  A Prayer Diary

Praying without ego

2/23/2020

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​To pray is to pay attention to something or someone other than yourself. Whenever a man concentrates his attention--on a landscape, poem, geometrical problem, an idol, or the True God—that he completely forgets his own ego and desires, he is praying.
      I put this quote by W.H. Auden on my cottagebythesea blog because I figured, even though God is mentioned, it wasn’t too religious. In trying to keep that blog about silence, solitude, and simplicity, I don’t write anything ‘too religious’. And yet, I assume that anyone with that longing probably taps into some desire for the ineffable.
   Auden’s understanding of prayer resonates with me. Prayer is not about me and my judgments. It isn’t about telling God what I think God should do for others. As I live day by day with prayer, I’m hearing more and more that prayer is about lifting up a person or situation to God. Jesus, being human and divine, has implanted this in my heart. 

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In God's prayerful presence

5/28/2019

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     If you long to be in God’s presence, if you feel called to prayer, accompany someone who has entered that prayerful presence with God.
     I am sitting with my 96 year old friend. It is quiet here; she is not speaking and neither am I. We are together in a deep holy place, each in our own solitude. Everything is simple; the only thing to do is be. The window flowers offer hope.
 


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Obsessed with prayer~

11/10/2018

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Here I am again, working through my ongoing conundrum about prayer. How does it all work? Is there a right way to pray? The questions take many forms. I’ll probably keep writing about this until I get it right, which will never be, so either put up with me, or find some other blog to capture you interest. The name of this blog, however, shouldn’t fool you. I’m obsessed with prayer; writing about it helps. So here I go again.
 
     When praying for people in a difficult situations, is there a right or better way to it? Sometimes we are asked to pray for specific results, such as for cancer cure (doesn’t give God any wiggle room). I understand the humanness of that I one, and at times I feel comfortable telling God what to do. But, really, that is more about God and me than about God and the person being prayed for.
      In other prayers we ask for good to happens, such as that medical staff use wisdom. That makes sense because I believe that God, as love, wants us to do our loving, compassionate best  and wants the best for all of us.
     The prayer I feel most called to offer is to lift people to the light as I image them walking with God. I both figurative and literally step out of God’s way, and open up energy for that light to shine (that’s what I think I’m doing). I have NO idea what God plans for anyone, but I trust that it is of the good.
      What keeps me going with the prayer obsession is my belief that we co-create with God, that we live in community with God, and that the universe needs our prayer/love. God has no power all by God’s self.
       So I pray as though life depends on it, and that my prayer makes all the difference. It sure does for me. My guidelines: pray in faith: be positive and loving.


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No more news; pray instead

10/8/2018

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​  This morning my post on acottagebythesea told of my commitment to stop watching the news, stop being obsessed with it, stop letting politicians run my life. I have no chance of being the person God wants me to be if I spend my waking hours being judgmental and angry, and for sure the news will lead me along that path.
     Specifically, if God is calling me to prayer for people, I have to do my part to keep my heart open. Being angry and judgmental closes my heart, closes out God, closes out communication between God and me, which is where true prayer lies. It’s as simple as that, and as challenging as that. Focusing on God, not on the news, is a way to start. 

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Praying at St. Trinita in Florence

4/15/2018

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One of my go-to prayer churches in Florence is St. Trinita, a small, gothic style church on Piazza Trinita, and near Ponte Trinita. A trinity in itself.
I sit in a pew that gives me a view of Christ’s life through art.


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Breathing amongst the puddles~

12/14/2017

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    What do I have to say about prayer today as I wind up my two weeks walking with God in Florence? Always, always start with gratitude! Indeed I am very grateful for this time alone in my beloved city. There is no excuse not to pray, but there are distractions, such as food, museums, and walking to avoid, and appreciate, puddles and people.
    If I’m serious about prayer, I have to keep doing it. Abstaining is not an option, although my prayer practices vary and change. My prayer may be more verbal, or less verbal; I may feel God’s presence in a different ways; sometimes I sense that God isn’t there at all. Regardless, one of the things I have learned on this trip is that I have to keep showing up. Return to the breath I tell myself, whether I am in a church, eating a pizza or walking the streets.

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Ego bound~

11/14/2017

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PictureMichelangelo's Bound Slave
Does this resonate with you? I struggle so hard to do it right with God, to pray without ceasing, to see the Christ in everyone I meet….I could go on and on. But, of course I fall short: I end up doing it right for me, I forget to pray, I project my faults on the people I meet…I could but I won’t go on and on.
A spiritual friend suggested that as a way to stop beating myself up I ask God what God wants of me. When we release our worries about how we act, and give them over to God, we become God centered, not self-centered. I know this, but in my self-involvement, I forget; I forget God. I wouldn’t be surprised if you resonate with this as well.

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One hour a day~

9/28/2017

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     How much time do we spend praying? Christian tradition reminds us a time when churches were open for services night and day, and when monks and others participated in the Daily Office. But nowadays? We’re on the run, at least those still working. As a retired person I have the luxury of time to pray, and since I have this call to pray for people, I’d better take the time. Intercessory prayer takes time. The preparation is intense in itself. Empty my mind of chatter and judgments so that thy will be done can enter.
     “Could you not watch one hour with me?” (Matthew 26:40), Jesus asks his disciples. He is asking me, for I am a disciple. I try to do just that for the first hour of my day. It’s a good practice, and for me it feels like a privilege.

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Elizabeth Warren Christian faith

9/6/2017

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     Did you know that Elizabeth Warren is a practicing Christian? Her faith was revealed in an article entitled “For Warren, faith is (quietly) critical to her public life” on the front page of the Boston Globe on September 3rd. I never knew this, nor I gather, do most of her fellow citizens. Those who knew are pastors of churches where she come to worship.
Evidently Warren is very private about her faith. She prays, reads the Bible, and follows Jesus. We have a little Jesus in all of us, she believes.
Recently, at the Ebenezer Baptist Church in Atlanta, Warren spoke on (Matthew 25:40).
     Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my breathren, ye have done it unto me
 
“He [Jesus}is saying to us, first there’s God in everyone of us, there’s Jesus in every one of us—however you see it in your religion, that inside there’s something holy in everyone.”
 
     What a powerful public statement for us Christians sitting to the left of the political spectrum. An affirmation and inspiration for us to speak out about our faith. It is also a powerful statement for all people working for peace, longing to be compassionate, and who can see Jesus as an model of human good.
 
     It seems that Warren’s life, both public and private, receives its energy, not from ego but from God. The Jesus in her speaks and acts for the poor, the powerless, the disadvantaged, and the underprivileged. It is worth noting that Joe Kennedy III recently referred to Matthew 25 in his plea from the senate floor for health coverage.

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Our daily bread

8/18/2017

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     Give us this day our daily bread. This prayer that Jesus taught us to pray can be interpreted in many ways. Here are a few of my thoughts before I start supper and put our daily bread on the table.
     Bread can mean food: enough to eat, enough to sustain us, enough for every day, not just when we become hungry. It can mean life force: our meaning and purpose in life. It can represent the bread that Jesus gave his disciples in the evening before he died and that we receive in communion. It can mean the Christ presence in our life.
     Although there are times when I am alone saying this prayer, the words aren’t only for me. Whether alone or with others, give US rolls off my tongue. Jesus must have been thinking of community. His message isn’t just for individuals; he wants us to think collectively. I love working on my own personal salvation, but that’s not point.

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