Blog Archives - A Prayer Diary

Striving for the fruit of the spirit~

5/29/2014

     In my readings I often come across various renditions and compilations of the ‘fruit of the spirit’. The best know is this collection in Galatians

    By contrast, the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against such things (5:22-23).

    A quick read and I say, ‘Sure, of course these are important way of being; I’m not a bad person.’

     But as I examine how I’m doing, I recognize that I have a mighty long way to go, and if I’m attentive I can catch myself failing miserably on each one. However, when I read that there is no law against these things, I feel a sense of relief and hope. Although it is up to me to work toward expressing these fruits in my life, I can only do so with God’s grace. That lightens the burden because it affirms what I already know--that on my own I can’t be loving, joyful, peaceful, patient, kind, generous, faithful, gentle, and self-controlled. I need God’s help. I need to know that God’s way doesn’t expect me to be perfect, that I will fail again and again, be forgiven again and again, but because of God’s grace I will have moments when I express spiritual fruit. That’s the best we humans can do.

Memorial Day "Taps"

5/26/2014

The Memorial Day parade goes by our house and stops across the street at the library to commemorate the Civil War. Minute Men, Civil War soldiers and servicemen representing all the wars then continue marching to Wadsworth Cemetery to remember those in the Revolutionary War. By the time they arrive at the Town Center, the firing of guns and the playing of ‘Taps” will have reminded us of all our country’s wars.

It’s a moving experience to hear the prayers, with words of remembering and peace. It’s a distressing experience to hear the guns, with sounds of remembering and war. Sometimes it’s hard to understand where the peace is in all. All those deaths echoed in “Taps”.

Knowing the Bible well~

5/23/2014

I remember my mom commenting that the Bible was her favorite book. “I know it well,” she said.

Familiarity with the Bible, knowing it well, can mean different things, can have different interpretations. Most of us don’t read it from cover to cover, although we may have some pattern or sequence to our reading. For example, I continually read and then reread the Gospels, Epistles and Psalms-- starting with Matthew, Romans and Psalm 1—over and over. I used to include the Torah, the first five books of the Hebrew Bible, but I gave that up. No good reason, other than it felt like toooo much. Now I read sections when suggested as part some other reading.

One way I’m beginning to believe that ‘I know it well’ is that when a book is mentioned, I can pretty much go right to it. Recently a group of us were looking for favorite scriptures. When someone called out a page number, I was confused. I realized that that’s just not the way I visualize or manage the Bible.

Pray, don't say~

5/20/2014

What do you say when your friend has lost her only living relative and feels so alone in the world? What do you say when your friend asks why God let all this happen to her? Most of us have some family; many of us more than we can keep track of. We can accept that life isn’t fair but that doesn’t always help how we feel.

What do I say? I do my best to say nothing. I listen. I try to get in touch with her pain. It isn’t the time to bring up all good things. It isn’t the time for a theological discussion about whether God is in charge of what happens. It is the time to pray. When life is dark, less is more--less talk and more prayer will let in the light.

The Art of Prayer~

5/16/2014

Most mornings I read a short section from The Art of Prayer: An Orthodox Anthology. Many of selections are by Theophan the Recluse (1815-94), who lived an enclosed life for twenty-eight years in the provincial monastery at Vyshen, Russia. He had plenty of time to write and to pray, and that is what he did--teaching us to open our hearts by repeating the Jesus Prayer: Lord Jesus Christ have mercy upon us.

The more I read his writings and try to follow them, the more I am aware that this opening of the heart is the way to God. Here are a few excerpts:

Attention to what goes on in the heart and to what comes forth from it is the chief work of a well-ordered Christian life.

It is well known that the whole purpose of those who are zealous in the spiritual life, is to place themselves in a right relationship with God: and this right relationship is realized and made manifest in prayer.

You must descend from your head into your heart. At present your thoughts of God are in your head. And God Himself is, as it were, outside you and so your prayer and other spiritual exercises remain exterior. While you are still in your head, thoughts will not easily be subdued but will always be whirling about, like snow in winter or clouds of mosquitoes in the summer.

Unceasing prayer overcomes evil through hope in God, it leads a man into a holy simplicity, weaning his mind from its habit of diversity in thought, and from devising plans about himself and his neighbors, keeping him always in scantiness and humility of thoughts.

By unceasing prayer curiosity, mistrustfulness and suspicion are destroyed, and because of this other people begin to seem good in our eyes.

Forgive but not forget~

5/13/2014

Praying for the girls continues. This is huge for each one of them, huge for Nigeria, huge for Africa, huge for the world. And here I am working out a little tiny hurt that I received recently, working to forgive someone for what appeared to me to be insensitivity. What would it take these girls to forgive their abductors? I’d better get with the program of life and forgive; I don’t have to forget, but where’s the hope in the world if I can’t forgive.

Nameless, but not soulless~

5/11/2014

Clearly one of the most moving services ever at my church this morning. We left with memories of musical contributions by the Senior Choir, the Gospel Choir of high school youth, and the Sudbury Bell Ringers, who offered the prelude, anthem and postlude. That would have been enough to sustain us for weeks to come. Truth be told, the music at MCC is always outstanding; we’re known for that, so let’s just say that the music is always moving.

     This morning, however, we left with a unique treasure in hand. We left with piece of paper with a name on it; a name unfamiliar to our English tongue; the name of a girl—we are sure of that; the name of one of the women abducted by the Muslims of Boko Haram, the Nigerian terrorist network. Along with other churches and places of worship around the world, we will be praying for these women, and for our person in particular.

   Actually, I have three pieces of paper: two names, Falta and Saratu, and ‘Child of God, name unknown’. There has been some concern about privacy in publishing the names—I guess I can understand, well a little. But I am particularly sad for the nameless women, nameless not soulless.

      Do we dare imagine what would happen if all the women (and men) in the world prayed for these 300 plus women? Let’s do our part; let’s give it a try.

May 08th, 2014

5/8/2014

Mom at her 100th birthday gathering.

My mom would have been 104 today, but it was time when she faded away at age 101. I’ve written this before but it’s worth hearing again, at least for me. Nine days before she died I wrote on a piece of paper, “God has been good to you your whole life.” She read it carefully, needing time to process, and then said, “It’s true…, very grateful.” Those were the last words she spoke. The core of Mom’s faith was gratitude. Maybe it be so for all of us.

Very grateful for Florence~

5/5/2014

Today was a day of gratitude. For my health, my family and friends; for my life situation that makes all of this possible. It’s all grace. I pray that I will use it well.

I’m also very grateful that while in Florence I was able to work on my memoir about my mom. I now have a draft that is ready for fine-tuning. Not surprising that the title is, “Very Grateful.”

I’ll be posting this tomorrow just before I start my travels home.

Prayer walks~

5/4/2014

Sometimes it's all about food.

My days living in Florence are coming to an end, at least for now; Tuesday I fly home. I have prayed in churches, prayed in parks, prayed on the streets and while crossing bridges. I have prayed for people I know and for strangers. I have prayed for peace, for me and for the world. I have lit candles for friends who are struggling. I have prayed words and prayed through my heart.

Please, I don’t mean to sound pious. For sure, I am not; and for sure, I don’t pray all the time. Often my mind wanders randomly. Sometimes I’m engaged in the art and architecture, and the beauty and particularities of Florence. Sometimes, um often, all my thoughts are on food.

That’s one way to summarize what my life of prayer looks like at this moment in my life. It will look a little different when I am home, but in truth, it’s more or less the same wherever I live.