But this was a prayerful decision, with prayer taking myriad forms: talking with God, meditation, emptying my mind of thoughts, as well thinking, gathering information, analyzing, and considering all those questions. Prayer is about considering choices, musing on them, wondering, asking questions, listening for answers, sitting with the answers, pondering unsatisfying responses, attending to answers that have anger or malice in them, and finally embracing a decision that is faithful, hopeful, and loving.
I cancelled my 3/6-3/20 solitary trip to Rome and Florence. It hardly counts as a prayerful decision because it was so easy to make. Why risk contracting the virus? Why worry my family and friends? Why get quarantined at some hotel at Logan Airport on my way home? I love walking the streets, but what if all the museums and churches are closed? And what about restaurants?
But this was a prayerful decision, with prayer taking myriad forms: talking with God, meditation, emptying my mind of thoughts, as well thinking, gathering information, analyzing, and considering all those questions. Prayer is about considering choices, musing on them, wondering, asking questions, listening for answers, sitting with the answers, pondering unsatisfying responses, attending to answers that have anger or malice in them, and finally embracing a decision that is faithful, hopeful, and loving.
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To pray is to pay attention to something or someone other than yourself. Whenever a man concentrates his attention--on a landscape, poem, geometrical problem, an idol, or the True God—that he completely forgets his own ego and desires, he is praying. I put this quote by W.H. Auden on my cottagebythesea blog because I figured, even though God is mentioned, it wasn’t too religious. In trying to keep that blog about silence, solitude, and simplicity, I don’t write anything ‘too religious’. And yet, I assume that anyone with that longing probably taps into some desire for the ineffable. Auden’s understanding of prayer resonates with me. Prayer is not about me and my judgments. It isn’t about telling God what I think God should do for others. As I live day by day with prayer, I’m hearing more and more that prayer is about lifting up a person or situation to God. Jesus, being human and divine, has implanted this in my heart. Lately my church has been evaluating the place of music in the Sunday service. Here are a few of my thoughts on the subject. Music is an essential part of any worship service; it is best addressed in the contest of worship. I come to church to worship in community, to open my mind, body, and spirit to God, to open my heart to love. Each part of the service does this for me; each is necessary for the service to be whole. I want to leave church feeling connected to God, loving my enemies, rejoicing in my friends and family, feeling gratitude, wanting to go out to God’s work, trying to follow Christ…. All of the components of church music are important --prelude, postlude, choir, covenant, other performances, and hymns. It is music that binds together all the elements of the service—welcome, prayer of invocation, children’s moment, scripture, message, joys and concerns, events of the church, prayers…. When I heard Mitt Romney say that his faith was most important to him, I thought, “Yes, that’s what I want to be able to say.” Well, I can say that but can I act on it as Romney did? Something comes up in my life and I wiggle a bit and not follow through faithfully; someone asks for help and I give myself a ‘legitimate’ excuse not to come forth. On the other hands, maybe it is easier to be faithful when a big decision come up. Not that I’ve been tested like Romney was. He admitted that the political consequences would be enormous, but being a man of faith, he knew that the spiritual consequences would be catastrophic. In facing God we want to be able to say and believe Thy will be done. In a recent sermon Br. Curtis Almquist asked, “What are you being call to be now? He is clear that he is called to be kind, but goes on to say: You would rightly ask me: So, are you kind? And I would answer, “yes.” “Yes, I am kind… except when I am not.” Kindness is one of the fruits of the spirit, but it was gentleness that immediately called out to me. Yes, I am gentle…except when I am not; the when-I-am-not is more dominant than I would like. I have directness and cutting-edge to me that God is calling me to soften. Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Which fruit is God calling you to embrace? www.ssje.org/2019/02/10/vocation-the-call-is-lifelong-br-curtis-almquist/ I need protection from the current epidemic and pandemic disease of verbal violence. I need protection so I won’t catch it. I see the symptoms in my being; in comments I throw out to politicians on the T.V., in unkind thoughts, and in ‘righteous’ conversations with others who agree with me. As a Christian I am offered hope in dealing with this, but it is a challenge. I have choices and Jesus. I can chose to pray for those with whom I don’t agree, to look for the log in my own eye and notice my flaws, to say I’m sorry and mean it, and to ask for forgiveness and accept it and make amends. When I call on the spirit of Jesus to be with me I notice I am less judgmental and more forgiving, less anxious and more accepting, less fearful and more hopeful, less angry and more loving. The challenge is to stay with him. |
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