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  A Prayer Diary

In the land of the living

8/29/2020

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I cry out to you, O Lord, I say, “You are my refuge, my portion in the land of the living.”
    The other night I woke up depressed. Yes, depressed; something that is not part of my disposition, nor my usual way of responding in the land of the living. The abuse of power by the president, and the crowds of people without masks overwhelmed me. 
     I try not to be political on my blogs; I strive to be compassionate and uplifting. And so, as I write this I feel compassion for everyone trying to stay alive during this pandemic. Wearing a mask and staying out of crowds, isn’t political, it is lifesaving. As Flannery O’Connor tell us, “The life you save may be your own.” 
      As I’ve mentioned before, I start each morning meditating, praying, and reading the Bible and other spiritual texts. This time with God gets me out of myself (in this case depression) and into God’s place of hope, faith, and love. God becomes my refuge, my portion (destiny) in the land where I live. Every morning I am grateful for this immediate paradigm shift. I am reminded that I am a human being, and thus I need this shift from self to God to happen again and again. And it does. 
     God is much bigger than what is going on now in this country right now, something more than we can hope for or imagine. Every morning God gives me hope, moving me out of despair so I can listen to what I can do to be more loving and compassionate.  ​

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Faith's home is in the heart

8/18/2020

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      I’m one of those people who tries sooooo hard to get this spiritual life right. The effort, however, catapults me out of my heart and into my head, where living a life with God becomes a daily exercise, something on my to-do list, rather than a way of life. 
     I know and have come to believe that faith’s home is in the heart, where the soul resides. This story by Joan Chittister catapults me out of my head and back into my heart. She prefaces the story with these wise words: 

The spiritual life is not something that is gotten for the wishing or assumed by affectation. The spiritual life takes discipline. It is something to be learned, to be internalized. It’s not a set of daily exercises; it’s a way of life, an attitude of mind, an orientation of soul. And it is gotten by being schooled until no rules are necessary.
 
Among the ancients there is a story told that confirms this insight to this day:

 
“What action shall I perform to attain God?” the disciple asked the elder.
 
“If you wish to attain God,” the elder said, “there are two things you must know. The first is that all efforts to attain God are of no avail.”
 
“And the second?” the disciple insisted.
 
“The second is that you must act as if you did not know the first,” the elder said.

 
Clearly, great pursuers of the spiritual life know that that secret of the spiritual life is to live it until it becomes real.

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Facing the certainty of death

8/10/2020

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A wonderful way to think and pray about the life to which you’ve been entrusted is to face into the certainty of your own death.  The only thing uncertain about death is how and when we will die.  Death is a part of life by God’s design.  By facing into the inevitably of death you will find enormous freedom and clarity in the moments of life which you have now.  All of us here may have as much as one more day, or another week, or another month, or year or perhaps many years. We don’t know.   Br. Curtis Almquist, SSJE
 
    During the pandemic there is no way to avoid thinking about death. We older folk are accustomed to considering how our end will come about and how our last years and days might be. We try to do some planning and do our best to be in control during this life stage. 
   But the pandemic shifts everything for us because of its unpredictability and its power. We can choose to protect ourselves by social-distancing and wearing a mask but there are no guarantees. There are medical choices and prayers we can make, but there is no certainty they will work out. Anyone of us may contract Covid-19!  
      I choose not to take up a hospital bed although I could end up in one. I ask not to be hooked up to a ventilator, but that could happen. 
     I pray that no one in my family feels guilty. I pray that I will remain grateful for all the blessings in my life. Remaining grateful is up to me; a choice I can control. 
    

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