Hard to pray with all the chatter in my life. Good thing, all the family activity. I’m not complaining, just observing.
Hard to pray with all the chatter in my life. Good thing, all the family activity. I’m not complaining, just observing.
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On my way to silence, solitude and simplicity yesterday, a truck with a window sticker, “Obama sucks” passed me on the highway. How do I respond? If I were into road rage I could have passed him, flashing my ‘Obama/Biden’ bumper sticker. Of course I wasn’t going to do that. I don’t want to be upset; I want to respond prayerfully; I want to add positive energy. My first step was to stop the chatter in my head about what such a negative message might mean. I didn’t venture into praying to change his (or her) mind politically. Rather, I started praying that peace surround him; I prayed for a change of heart so that he wouldn’t express his feelings negatively. Positive energy begets positive energy. Peace begets peace. At the cottage I never turn on the TV. I could, but I don’t. At home I often watch The News Hour. The other evening, however, I turned it off. I didn’t want any more details of the killings; I didn’t want any more analysis about gun control. Please don’t misunderstand me. I know all this has to be done, but not for the role I feel called to play. Details and analysis are counterproductive (to use a worldly term) to my prayer. The more silent and simple I become, the clearer God can hear my prayer for love, which I believe is the prayer of everyone--the church-goer, the upright citizen, the helpful, the helpless, the mentally ill, everyone. We all want the unconditional love that is God; that is what I am praying for. Early morning walk. Well, somewhat early. I set out at 7:30, passing a few walkers and one jogger along the way. There is something about the morning that encouraged me to walk a longer route-- I could have kept going all over town. No guilt about starting the day doing ‘nothing’. Yes, I was exercising, but mainly I was talking and listening to God. My talk went something like this, “Well, God, what do you want me to do? You know that I don’t want to do a lot, that I want to sit in the silence with you, that I want to lead a simple life, that I want to pray for people, and that I need solitude for that.” “That’s what I want you to do. Does that answer your question?” “Yes. Help me surrender. I feel so many obstacles.” That was all I could hear but it is enough to ponder. I have some thought that I need to live from my heart more than from my head, that I have to keep looking through a God lens. From the deck this afternoon. What a day! I wrote about it on my acottagebythesea.net blog. In summary, it’s about how going to yoga class disrupted the silence, solitude and simplicity of my time at the cottage. Big learning lesson. Afterwards, as I sat on the deck eating my lunch and reflecting on the experience, it became clear that God was ‘telling’ me to stop being so busy, so active all the time. Yes, exercise is important for my health, and particularly to strengthen my bones, but that I don’t need to overdo my planning and activity. With that, I felt incredible freedom, which is still there. And yes, as the expression goes, “God is still speaking,” this time in my afternoon reading. From Isaiah 58:11 I read: The Lord will guide you continually, and satisfy your needs in parched places, and make your bones strong; and you shall be like a watered garden, like a a spring of water, whose waters never fail.” If you glance at my cottage blog you can get a sense of the wonderful and windy adventure I’ve had on my way to Iona, where I am now happily settled at the Argyll Hotel, with front seats to watch the ferry come and go, and attempt to come and go. Today I borrowed “wellies” and waterproof pants and ventured to the abbey, with the Holy Spirit speaking through the wind and accompanying me all the way right through the door, down the nave and into the Quiet Corner. Not your usual silence…. But wait…. This silence and solitude is more nuanced when in God’s hands, or so it seems. I lit a candle for a friend recovering from surgery and sat praying for her and for others on my list; two women came along, used my candle to light theirs, and sat for a while; another woman came in, lit three candles, and went out; a young couple lit a candle and sat. It came over me that all of us were experiencing silence and solitude together, in this community created by God. |
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